Women in Ministry - (My Letter to Ms. Broggi)

OK...Before reading this post make sure you read this blog post first.

If you are all caught up on things....then...here is the full text of my letter to Mrs. Broggi:

Dear Mrs. Broggi,

I just read your article from Spring/Summer 2006 on Women in Ministry. First of all, let me say that from a principle standpoint I agree wholeheartedly with the point that you make about the ministry of women in the home. After reading, I don't know how else to describe how I feel except to say I'm "on fire". There is a connection of sorts because you mentioned that your husband went to DTS. My Dad went too. He was actually the first African-American to receive his doctorate from the seminary and I was the seminary baby :). Also my sister is a DTS graduate.

My heart bleeds for mothers and for the lost love and art of mothering. I could go into more detail about how I am currently working to expose Moms I know to the message you so eloquently share on your website. But rather than talk about me any longer, I wanted to ask you some questions about your article. There were a few spots where I wasn't clear on some of the information you presented. I have already forwarded to my Mommy Friends (we have a small little online network where we encourage and support one another). In passing along your message, I want to make sure that I understand some things.

Let me reiterate, I agree with your article, but I do have questions about a few of your points.

Although I understand and agree with the point that many women today are being encouraged into ministry primarily outside of their homes, how do Beth Moore, Kay Arthur, and some of the others you mentioned directly contribute to this? I know Beth and Kay personally. I know that Beth was home with her children and didn't start her public ministry until they were older, if not when they had graduated from high school. Kay Arthur personally told me that there are too many young mothers today abdicating their little ones for responsibilities outside the home. She has told my sister the same thing.

I have also heard both Kay & Beth include the message of motherhood and family in their messages. I'm not sure that I understand your criticism "Over the years, I have learned that none of the big name women Bible teachers help women in this area." I think they have. Is it their main ministry platform? No. Is that wrong? I don't think so. I think that teaching on mothering and homemaking is best done one on one anyway. How much can you really learn in an arena filled with 20,000 about cooking healthy meals or nursing babies, or child discipline. The discipleship model works best for this don't you think?

Could you please explain why your article specifically points to these women? Are you saying that their only teaching ministry should be one of ministry to women about a woman's role in the home? Or are you saying that because women in audiences everywhere are glorifying these ladies, that these same women are themselves reveling in a ministry outside their families. I'm not sure that I am connecting that principle you are presenting in your article with these women and the way they are currently living their lives, running their ministries, and delivering their messages. Can you clarify?

Also, there are ministries out there that EXIST to encourage women in the role of mothering....Above Rubies, MOPS, Proverbs 31, Donna Otto, to name a few. They might not all do it perfectly, but their sole purpose is to encouragement women in their role as wives/mothers. Your article pointed so much to what was wrong in Christendom, but there are some people trying to counterbalance the negativity surrounding our role as women.

I agree with you that there is so little encouragement, teaching, and discipleship from older women to younger women but does that mean that everytime an older woman encourages a younger woman by saying that the day is coming when there will be more to her life than diapers, is this wrong? I am perusing your site and looking at the ministry you have to wives and mothers. The lady that you mentioned in your article that encouraged to hope for ministry...was she so terrible? You do have a wonderful ministry today. Although, I'm sure she could have encouraged you in what you were doing AND also encouraged you to look towards days without little ones, isn't it possible that her heart was right? Maybe she already saw in you the call you felt for mothering. Maybe she thought that you didn't need encouragement because you were already doing such a good job. I don't know that woman or her intention but I do know my Mom. She was home with me and encourages me now in my role as a wife and a mother, but it also does give me additional hope when she talks of how my gifts and talents will CONTINUE to be used for my family and others later in life. I don't view her encouragement as a put down on mothering at all. She is encouraging me regarding different seasons of my life.

Maybe your article is so condemning of women who tell mother's about future ministry because in your experience that is all there is....maybe in your experience there are hardly ANY older women encouraging mothers to be at home with their children and to give their families their all. When I read your article I understood, yet also bristled because in MY experience, I have had a balanced message. I hear that I am doing the most important thing and that when I have more time later that I might also use this ministry to encourage others - other mothers as well as other Christians in general.

I am a praise and worship leader at my church. I used to lead 1-2 Sundays a month. Now I lead maybe 2-3 times a year. I don't continue to lead because I am looking for some outside fulfillment but because it is my passion and I believe it is a gift from God. I use it in my home AND I use it to edify the body of Christ as my home responsibilities and my husband allows. I love my home and love my kids. When we rehearse, I have singers come to my home so that I can rehearse AFTER my babies are sleeping. So I get your point. I'm just not sure that I understand all of the assumptions you make regarding these specific "big name" ministries and well-meaning older ladies. It seems a bit harsh.

Maybe it should be....maybe because there are so many unbalanced women out there, you feel the need to shake them up a bit. I just feel like your article makes a great point and conclusion using data that may not be complete or that is one-sided. The article carries such a positive message but from such a negative argument. It makes the point hard to hear because I have to shuffle through things that I'm not sure are completely true (1. The big name ladies aren't supportive of mothering and family first and 2. All older women encouraging younger women devalue motherhood just because they point toward that one day the younger women will be more free to minister to others.)

Can't we have both? Can't we have women who have raised their children helping us go deeper in the Word. Can't we have older women helping us to learn our jobs as mothers and giving us hope that one day we will have the option of doing other things as the Lord leads?

Maybe your point is that we should have both but that our Christian society of women DON'T generally do both? OK...I'm rambling but I think you get my point.

OK... there is one more thing I wanted to ask...

When talking about Mrs. Lotz and Mrs. Briscoe, you discuss their frustration with mothering. Although I get your point about how they were not encouraged to find joy and fulfillment in mothering, do you honestly feel as though every women will LOVE IT? My sister struggles. She loves her children, she loves her family, but she doesn't love the job of mothering. After reading the article, it seems that you leave no room for women of all makes and temperaments. I do believe that mothering is a choice. I know older ladies that gave their children their all, but they are glad that season is over with. They don't miss the diapers, the dirty dishes, or constant laundry....but they were diligent and committed during that season.

Let me reiterate I agree with all of your principles. I just thought I bring to your attention some spots where the article left me a little unsteady about assumption made about other women in ministry, intentions of older women, and the feelings a woman may have, even as she follows God's leading.

I know I have rambled. I would love to hear from you. Please feel free to email me back as well as call if an email would take too long. Also, feel free to leave me your number if you'd like for me to foot the bill (I am in Texas). Rest assured, I am not a crazy lady. I sincerely want to understand some of the finer points of your article. Thanks for taking the time to read this email. God bless you in the work you are doing to draw mothers back to the original call and plan of God.

I typed this in a hurry. The babies are sleeping and I need to start dinner but I really wanted to pose my questions to you. Excuse any grammar mishaps or awkward sentences.

Grateful to be living my life,

Chrystal

Stay tuned for Mrs. Broggi's responses...I'll be posting a little bit each day throughout the week. She was gracious enough to respond but it was LONG so I won't post it all in one day. If you just want to read all of it at once - just go HERE.